Tuesday, January 12
Im feeling troubled.
Im feeling trouble due to reasons I don't know.
I just feels like bursting into big tears,
isit school that's abit tiring and stress?
I doubt so , cause it's only the starting
of school & it should be fun instead .
Isit not enough of sleeps ? I think I had enough today.
But I still seems so troubled . Just now
while hiding inside the toilet wanting
to cry out , I was at a moment of
my own , feeling everything around me
seems to stop and even the clock has
stop ticking .
I thought to the moment I saw mummy
crying to the web-cam telling me that
someone is giving her the feeling of she's useless.
I suddenly thought through alot of past,
I want to start tearing , I don't know
what to do. I still cannot let the past off.
It seems so impossible.
I thought I have let go of it 1 year back ,
but I was wrong super wrong , cause
I didn't forget at all , it was just left in
a corner in my heart, kept some where behind
all doors & hidden behind my heart.
Maybe I cannot be compared
to anyone worst than me , but I really
never thought things like that would happened .
I never wanted to lose anything just like that.
But I don't have any choice to make.
Looking into the photos of me as a kid ,
tears just couldn't stop falling . As I can see that
smile is so true so real.
See that photo of us taken with you.
I really miss you alot, but everything
is too late to say. You left for another woman ,
you hurt everyone's heart in our family.
& you never return at all .
I still felt the scar , I still felt it as fresh as
it was . Time couldn't heal , even when I tried.
After all I believe but wish it was just a dream.
Where I know it's impossible cause it's
reality.
Mrs. Geek ended @ 12:46 AM